Fuck You, RFK Jr. Fuck You And Anti-Vaxxer Bullshit

You disgust me and everyone that believes in you is fucking trash.

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Every single one of Trump’s Cabinet picks, most of whom have been selected for him by Project 2025 or Russia, are uniquely awful, unqualified, and astonishingly dangerous. If they all got Luigied tomorrow, I wouldn’t shed a single tear, except maybe because I would be laughing so hard.

One of them, however, I find personally offensive. The title of this article, “Fuck You, RFK Jr. Fuck You And Anti-Vaxxer Bullshit,” miiiiiight have tipped you off as to whom I may be talking about.

So here’s why I hate Linda McMahon…

Fuck that. Let me tell you, in great detail, why I greatly anticipate the day Robert Francis Kennedy Jr. shuffles off this mortal coil. There are few things in this world I will celebrate as loudly (and drunkenly) as that motherfucker’s death.

I’ve been shitting on Kennedy since he became an attention whore in 2023, back when the legacy press was pretending he was a serious challenger to Joe Biden.¹ I had been vaguely aware of RFK Jr. before that but, like the vast majority of the country, I didn’t give a shit about him. But once he started to scream “Look at me! Look at me!”? Well…I did. And what I saw disgusted me.

This is how I felt about Kennedy’s war on the HPV vaccine in 2023:

When you see someone demanding an end to HPV vaccines, you have to conclude, based on the evidence, that they want women to suffer.

The cruelty and sickness required to want women to die simply as a means to deprive them of sexual agency is staggering. This is what RFK Jr. is enabling. It doesn’t matter if he really believes he’s the good guy or not. His anti-vaxxer stupidity is furthering the right’s very clear and obvious anti-woman agenda. For that, he’s earned my eternal loathing.

I’m not kidding when I tell you that I hated this fuckstick before it was cool. 😜

But the thing that REALLY set ablaze the fires of rage and absolute hate in my soul for Kennedy was his anti-vaxxerism/autism crap. I took that personally.

Better dead than like my son? Eat shit and die. Slowly.

If you’re not already aware of it, my son Jordan is autistic. He is not a high-functioning autie. He will never be able to care for himself. He will never be able to live on his own. He will, for the rest of his life, need a guardian to take care of him. Unless you live this, you cannot possibly understand the terror of it.

My wife and I are in our early 50s. Jordan will be 17 soon. By the time he is in his 30s, we won’t be able to take care of him anymore. By the time he’s in his 40s or 50s, we’ll be dead. His sister Anastasia will be there but who will take care of him 7 days a week? Will the assisted living facility he’ll end up in be good to him? Or will he be abused with no way to tell anyone? Hence, the terror.

Now, in a perfect world, we as a society would be moving forward and addressing these concerns. There are millions MILLIONS of families just like ours and millions MILLIONS of children and adults just like Jordan. Autism is not “getting worse” but we are getting better at identifying it and with a growing population, there are simply more autistic kids being born. Just like there are more left-handed kids, more LGBTQ kids, more (insert inherent trait here) kids.

But we do not live in a perfect world, do we? No, we live in a world where fucking assholes like Robert F. Kennedy Jr. tell people that vaccines cause autism. Here’s the problem with that other than the obvious and why god help anyone who spews this shit in front of me in real life.

Put aside the indisputable fact that anti-vaxxerism kills. Kennedy is DIRECTLY responsible for over 80 people dying from a Measles outbreak in American Samoa. Over 60 of those killed? Children under the age of 4. The rest were almost all under the age of 15. For that alone, he should be kicked in the balls every time he walks out in public. Child killers deserve nothing but scorn for life.

The autism thing is what really makes Kennedy a true monster in my eyes, though. The same goes for all his little anti-vaxxer disciples.

Follow me here.

We know that vaccines have all but wiped out at least a dozen childhood diseases. Some of them are just annoying, like Chickenpox. But a number of them are truly lethal, like Measles and Polio and Diphtheria.² All of these were responsible for tens of thousands of deaths a year. If not death, then crippling injuries.

But Kennedy wants you to know those vaccines might just cause autism! Therefore, you shouldn’t trust them. In fact, maybe stop giving them to your kids. An awful lot of people think that’s a good idea.

That’s what they say.

This is what I hear:

“Hey, Ogre. I look at your son. Your sweet, kind, loving child who would never in a million years think of hurting someone. Your teenage boy with a big smile and silly laugh who every one of his teachers has adored since he was two years old.³ Jordan, who loves to cuddle with his mother and loves J-Pop and Yo Gabba Gabba and Mickey Mouse and Dora the Explorer.

Yeah, I look at THAT kid and see something so horrific and vile and disgusting that I would rather risk my own children dying than be like him. I would happily watch my children suffocate to death because they cannot breathe as their lungs fill with fluid before I’d risk them being autistic like that subhuman creature you call your son. I’d cheerfully bury my babies six feet under if it meant I wouldn’t have a single child like yours.”

Anti-vaxxers who believe vaccines cause autism believe this. They won’t say it out loud but it is, in fact, what they believe. It has to be. Literally nothing about autism anti-vaxxerism makes sense unless you truly believe that death is better than autism.

I’m very protective of my son. I almost punched one of his elementary teachers out (a man) because he was being thoughtless. I reamed a middle school teacher out (a woman) for half an hour for the crime of making decisions for Jordan without involving us. Debbie and I tag-team terrorized a vice principal who talked down to us about Jordan. She avoided us in the hallways forever after.

Now imagine how I would respond to someone effectively telling me that my son is an abomination. That death or mutilation is preferable to his existence. I’m not super quick to speak up when someone insults me in real life because, pfft, what do I care? Little people with little minds mean little to me. Also, at my size, physical confrontations become dangerous. But my kids? That’s a different story.

Kennedy is a direct threat to my son. And I need you to understand this. People who see autism as a horror see autistic people as a horror. The two are inextricable. That only leads to one place: Hate.

The disabled are already treated like shit in this country. The autistic community is barely understood to begin with. In 2016, the police shot the caretaker of an autistic adult while he was lying on the ground, begging the cops not to shoot him or his charge, who was sitting on the floor playing with a toy truck.⁴

Spend several years openly demonizing autism and that kind of thing will become common. People hate what they fear and Kennedy loves to make people afraid. Afraid of vaccines. Afraid of doctors. Afraid of modern medicine and expertise and progress. Afraid of autism. Afraid of my son.

I know Democrats are going to have a lot on their plate when they take back the House, and quite possibly the Senate, next year. The corruption is already worse than anything we’ve seen in our lifetimes. I would strongly urge them, however, to carve out some special time to destroy RFK Jr.

Let me list a few other reasons besides the fact he offends me on a molecular level:

1. He’s a fucking junkie. No offense to people struggling with addiction but, sorry, not sorry, you don’t get to be in charge of the health of the United States if you have a predilection for heroin and steroids.⁵

2. Captain Brainworm™ (my favorite nickname for this asshole, courtesy of the fabulous

   Shannon Argueta
   ) is literally brain-damaged. Come on, man. Literal. Brain. Damage.

3. He’s a credibly accused rapist. Kennedy has been desperately trying to live up to his family’s legacy of fucking anything that moves. Apparently, consent is not required. How many of his female staff is he going to sexually assault? One can only guess.

4. He’s a liar and a fraud. Kennedy lies. A lot. Again, desperate to live up to his legacy, he just makes shit up all the time about how awesome he is. Spend a lifetime lying and you lose touch with reality. He just spits out whatever he thinks people want to hear at any given time. What could possibly go wrong with this shithead in charge of America’s healthcare?

5. He’s openly hostile to science. Are you a doctor? Do you have decades of experience in your field? Do you have reams of studies to support the best course of action to save as many lives as possible? Who fucking cares?! Robert F Kennedy Jr. watched a Youtube video and talked to a guru who drinks snake piss! Your arguments are invalid!

6. He betrayed everything he ever pretended to believe in for power. RFK Jr. is a man of the people! A champion of the environment! A savior of the children! And now he works for a fascist regime that is going to pour more pollution into the drinking water of children than anything we’ve seen since Victorian-era England. Children will die as Trump cuts off food and healthcare and housing for millions. Poverty will explode. But Kennedy will be able to stick it to Big Pharma, a little bit, so who gives a shit about all of that, right? Man of the Fucking People. Fucking them over for personal gain, maybe.

RFK Jr. is an unforgivable piece of filth I wouldn’t even scrape off of my shoe. I’d burn the shoe first. He’s going to die soon because no 71-year-old can inject that many steroids after a life of drug abuse and not be killing themselves at a rapid pace. For my part, I hope he has his heart attack or stroke on TV so I can enjoy watching him die. If we’re all lucky, it’ll happen before he kills tens of thousands of children and teaches a generation to hate my son.

Fuck you, Kennedy. And fuck everyone who supports you. Your own family hates you, your wife knows you’re a cheating scumbag, and you’re going to die alone. Maybe, if you’re lucky, I’ll be there to keep you company. But as I mentioned at the beginning of this piece, I’ll be laughing the entire time you slip away, hoping you’ll tell me with your final breath that the bright light you see is actually the flames of hell.

There are 45 days until the first Blue Wave starts in Wisconsin and 262 days until it hits Virginia and Pennsylvania. If I were a billionaire fascist, I’d think REALLY hard about getting out of the way.

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1. Kennedy was never a serious challenger. The legacy press knew it but they were so desperate to drag Biden down, they just fucking lied about how “dangerous” Kennedy was to the Democratic nominee. I hope every reporter who lied has a kid or grandkid or niece or nephew and they all get Measles. This is what you wanted and now you should pay the price, you miserable scumbags.

2. WTF?! Diphtheria has a 5-10% death rate in kids and used to be one of the leading causes of death in children? How did I not know that until JUST NOW?

3. Jordan was diagnosed at 18 months and started Early Intervention classes by age two.

4. You’ll be shocked SHOCKED to learn that despite shooting a man laying on the ground with his hands in the air begging for him not to shoot a mentally disabled person, the cop was not found guilty of attempted murder. No punishment. Nothing.

5. Oh, I fucking said it, you little fake-ass bitch. Those muscles ain’t fucking real. Wanna sue? Go pee in a cup first and get tested. No? Didn’t think so, fuckwad.