Enough With The Whining Of Men
I can't "bear" it anymore.
You know, I wasn’t going to weigh in on the whole bear thing because, Jesus Fucking Christ, it’s so unbelievably stupid. Not the premise, but the manbaby meltdown that followed. It’s been over a week and the whining has not stopped. So. Much. Fucking. Whining!!!
If you somehow miraculously missed all of this, god, I fucking envy you. And I am sorry in advance for ruining your perfect state of ignorant bliss.
Back in March, this guy said that women would prefer to come across a bear in the woods than a man they didn’t know. The post went viral and people started to present the scenario as a question, which would you rather come across, the bear or the man? Women overwhelmingly said, “The bear" and penis internet has been mansplaining and crying rivers of tears ever since.
But the bear is more dangerous!
Bears kill people!
I would never hurt a woman!
Not all men!
My favorite, and a recurring one, “Women want/need men to protect them!”
Protect them from…who? Bears? Wolves? Rampaging gorillas?
The answer, of course, is other men. But we’re not supposed to talk about that.
The fact is between 1/4 and 1/3 (closer to 1/3) of all women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetimes. A much higher number will be sexually harassed. And it starts when they’re just children.
I’m not talking about being sexually assaulted as kids by creepy uncles and priests and whatnot which is a whole other horrible discussion. I’m talking about the bullshit girls have to put up as early as elementary school. Boys pulling their hair and “stealing kisses.” So innocent!
But then they get to middle school. By the time she was in 6th grade, Lila was routinely being sexually harassed. So was Lillian, one of the girls in my D&D group. Anastasia has never said anything but that won’t last forever. She starts high school next year and high school is even worse. College? Rampant sexual assault. There’s a reason I have them in self-defense.
But to hear penis internet go on about this, they’re the actual victims here:
My god, the victimization. The whining. The big sobby baby tears from grown-ass men. What in the actual fuck is wrong with these people?
I mean, on one level, I get it. Women who do not know me are not comfortable in my presence if we’re alone. I’m a big fucking guy and absolutely nothing about me says, “soft and cuddly” until you talk to me.
Kids love me. They think I’m a giant jungle gym to climb on. But women? Not so much. Lila once commented, “How could anyone ever be scared of you?” Her mother had to remind her that she’d known me since she was 8. Of course she doesn’t think I’m scary. But if she met me in the woods and had never seen me before? Very different story.
It’s exhausting having women shy away from me in elevators, something I didn’t notice until my 30s. I imagine that must be what it’s like to be Black but all the time in every situation, not just when they’re alone with a little white girl.1
The difference, of course, is men have in fact earned their reputation. Women are not being mugged, beaten, harassed, raped, and murdered by other women. Men are doing that. Not bears. Men.
Worse, even as this happens every second of every day, we tell women it’s their fault. What were you wearing? Were you drinking? Why were you out alone at night? What were you thinking?
Or we tell them it didn’t happen at all. No bruises? You’re not bleeding? You let him do it to get it over with? Are you sure it was “legitimate rape?”2 Did you lead him on? Were you asking for it? Did you secretly enjoy it?
But, you know, men are the real victims here. Poor, oppressed men whose feelings are hurt because women are choosing a bear in a purely hypothetical situation.
The general consensus is that all of these men have proven the point of all of these women. This, in turn, has only made the men angrier, thus proving the point even more. The more people, men or women, try to explain it to them, the angrier they get.
It’s funny but not funny because, honestly, none of us would be surprised to read a headline that this actually happened in real life.
If you’ve spent the last couple of weeks in a red fog over women picking a bear over men, you’re the reason why they picked the bear. Now get the fuck over yourself and stop being the reason. And for fuck’s sake, stop fucking whining!
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Possibly one of the funniest bits ever filmed for TV.
Republicans have an awful lot of ways to describe rape so they don’t have to admit that it’s rape.
Well, the moral of the story is women should carry bear spray and give these overgrown toddlers something to REALLY cry about
The "one time I got passed over for a promotion because I'm male" irritates out of me. Oh, one time you had to endure what most professional women deal with regularly? Cry me a f*ckin river. Last I checked, there were fewer women heading Fortune 500 companies than men named John.
And yet workplace discrimination is such a small percentage of what we deal with. So these guys have to deal with the analogy to one of the relatively minor downsides to being female one time, and it scars them for life, judging by how often I hear it.